Mother's Day at New Culture.

it says bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh. Now this word is used two times to define women and then three times it is for military aid. That changes things a bit, right? Because when you're thinking of women and you hear it in this context of helper, in our culture we think of people that serve, people that help in soft and gentle ways. But it's not just to aid in those soft and gentle ways. Yes, that is true of women, but also military aid. That is a different type of power. So that changes our definition to say, wait a second. Were we actually created to be that powerful help, that powerful aid?

The other sixteen times that word is mentioned in the Old Testament is to define the character of God, which is pointing to what we know to be true. We were created in the image of God in the same way that men were. And then I want you to think about that context. Knowing what we know, when you're hearing Adam say, bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh, I think sometimes it can be interpreted as almost like an ownership thing, right? Like you are mine. But what if instead it's how God intended and we think of it as more of mine as the same, the same bone, the same flesh? We're created as partners. We're created as equal.

One of the reasons why this has been so important to me, the more I get to speak on this, and we've never done this on a Sunday before, but I get to go sometimes to different women's conferences and events. They ask me to speak on women. I'm always like, are you sure you want me to do that? Because I don't know if it's going to be what you want. But the way I see this, and why it's become more and more important for me to help other people understand and lean into our identity as women, is because I truly believe that our daughters' destinies are dependent on this.

When it says in the end times that sons and daughters are going to prophesy, that means we today as the church have to start to make room for those sons and those daughters to do those things.

Spiritual mamas: their stories

We're going to go through a few women that we want to highlight, our spiritual mamas. The best way to start would be talking about the first woman in the Bible: Eve. I think she's got a little bit of a bad rap. I say thanks, Eve, all the time. But she's the first woman, and I just want to talk about the weight of going first.

Historically when we talk about Eve, if you grew up going to church with felt board Sunday school, she gets blamed. It wasn't an apple, I think it was like a mango or something cooler than an apple. But it's like her biting an apple and then there's the pain of childbearing. That's what we talk about when we talk about Eve. But what we don't talk about is that she was the first. Can you imagine for like five seconds being the first person to be pregnant? That's crazy. That's horrifying. That's insane. The first person to have labor pains. That's terrifying. Then figuring out how to maneuver that and like what to do next. She was the first person to maneuver relationship and raising kids and doing life.

She didn't have a Facebook mom group. She didn't have the mommy blog. She didn't have her mom that went before her or her friends that were doing it with her. It was just her. No mentors, no guides, no choice but to be brave. Eve is not only the first woman to experience the love of motherhood. She's the first mom to grieve a child. Eve's sons die. She loses one of her children before his time.

When we really look at Eve, she's holding the very first experiences. Losing a child is a shared experience among women through generations. And Eve went first. There's something to be said and there's honor to be given to literally the ultimate trailblazer. There was no path to walk on. She just started walking and she had to pull together the brokenness of the world that had started in her life.

To the person in the room who's going first, the first time college student, the first one to leave home, the first one to try a new way of doing life, the first one to try to break different cycles. You're not the only one walking in that. Scripture is full of this. When we look at Eve, we see someone who went first. The same curse that Eve walked through first, Mary walks through and the curse is broken. We get to see that and it started at Eve.

The next one we're looking at is Leah. This story in the Old Testament is essentially that she was the result of this really shameful, awful trick. Jacob works seven years to essentially become the husband of Rachel and have Rachel be his wife. After seven years, he goes and it's his wedding night and all of a sudden it's Leah and it's not Rachel. There's so many layers to that story. Jacob didn't get the woman that he loved and had worked for for seven years. And then think about that for Leah, like that shame. Like you were second best. You were the one that was not wanted. That's what that looks like.

She's someone that was used. She was completely abused. But here's what I love about her story: God completely redeems it. Leah was the mother of Judah. Judah is the tribe from which we see Jesus the Messiah, the Savior of the world. The son of Leah. We see here that yes, Leah was one of many women all throughout history and even today in our culture that share in this pain of being abused, of suffering, of being mistreated, of dealing with shame that comes from that.

But what does our God do? He completely redeems it. That should encourage us today, wherever we're at, to know that God is still working, that he will have the final say, and that he wants to use these things to restore us and to redeem what has been taken from us.

The next one is Jochebed, which is the mother of Moses. I love this story because you see both the mother and then Pharaoh's daughter, Moses's adopted mother. Moses is this great man of God. He led the people out of Egypt out of captivity. But also he had a mother. He had one mother, Jochebed, who sacrificially was willing to say I care more about the will of God than I do to physically keep my son with me. So she gave up her son. The story is that she laid him in a basket and she gave him up because she knew that God needed to use him. She was willing to lay down her son.

We see there a beautiful picture of Pharaoh's daughter who adopted Moses and took Moses in. But then Jochebed got to go and be the wet nurse, got to care for Moses anyway. It's such a beautiful picture. Once again, we see how God honors our obedience, that he honors us putting his will above everything else. We see this idea of sacrificing. We see this idea of being relentless to pursue the will of God.

Another woman that we see in 1 Samuel 1 through 2 is Hannah. Hannah's story is about waiting and prayer. She's waiting for a child. She can't get pregnant. Especially in that culture, so much of your identity was wrapped up in whether or not you could carry a child. So this is huge. She prayed and prayed and prayed. God gave her that child. We see the power of prayer here in her teaching us the importance of coming to God in prayer.

Here's what scripture tells us about Hannah. In 1 Samuel, it says:

Once they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh, Hannah stood up. Now Eli the priest was sitting on his chair by the doorpost of the Lord's house. In her deep anguish, Hannah prayed to the Lord, weeping bitterly, and she made a vow saying, Lord Almighty, if you will only look on your servant's misery and remember me and not forget your servant, but give her a son, then I will give him to the Lord for all the days of his life and no razor will ever be used on his head.

1 Samuel 1:9-11

I'm going to talk about my favorite least favorite person in the Bible. She's a theoretical person. Her name is the Proverbs 31 woman. I think she's always been taught to us as this really unattainable feeling of, no, I cannot do all things. Because she really is the woman of all things. She's this image that we're told to reach for.

I'd like to start by saying, if you read Proverbs 31, men and women can learn from Proverbs 31. When we really look at her, she's actually ridiculously relatable to the modern woman. She's a mom. She's a wife. She's a working woman. She has a business. She's trying to figure out how to balance being a busy human. We can all relate to busy. That's what she is. She's a busy person.

I think a lot of times we look through all the things that Proverbs 31 tells us that this woman does and what it looks like to be this Proverbs 31 woman, and it feels like, oh my gosh, I can't do it all. But what I love is it tells you all these things she does and then it defines her at the very end. It defines her by saying a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Regardless of what part of this woman is your reality, maybe it's that you're the mom that has to be up at ridiculous hours with your children that don't understand that sleep is precious. Maybe it's you are the working woman. Maybe you have two jobs or you're pursuing a career or a degree. To fear the Lord is the essence of this definition of being a Christian. But we're talking about biblical womanhood. The definition is to be someone who fears the Lord in all things. And you're rising and you're sleeping and you're working and you're caring in all the moments when you're being the entrepreneur or you're just being the person. It's to be a woman who fears the Lord. And that feels a lot more attainable than all those other things.

Then the New Testament comes in. The Lord decides to start the New Testament with the story of a woman. He decides to open the New Testament redeeming Eve. We see Mary, the mother of Jesus, who is a woman who fears the Lord.

The unknown marks Mary's story. She's literally just chilling, minding her business, and she gets thrown the curveball of a lifetime. We all understand what it feels like to be minding your business and then life hits you at the speed of lightning. And you're faced with unknown challenges and new situations and unknown circumstances.

What I love so much about Mary is all of this comes, it hits her in the face. She asks questions. She has her doubts. And then comes the moment where she has to decide what she's going to do with this situation. She says, I am the Lord's servant. May your word to me be fulfilled. She has this faithfulness to trusting the God of her ancestors, the God who carried her there. She has this immediate knowing. I don't know what's ahead, but I know who just spoke to me. And I love that she doesn't need to know what's next. She just needs to know who's holding her future. That's God. And she's willing to be faithful to that because she knows he'll be faithful to her.

I really want to point out this parallel between Mary and Eve. Eve loses her son. Eve watches her child die. Mary welcomes this baby into the world, gives everything for this child, and she joins this cloud of mothers that are bereaved and lose their child too soon and are grieved. Eve loses her son. When Eve loses her son, Abel, Cain kills Abel. Immediately there's a curse, right. Immediately as soon as that happens, the impact of that death is this blood has hit the ground. Because of this blood, there's a curse throughout the generations. Then there's this flip where Mary gives birth to this child. This child dies. This blood is the very thing that breaks the curse that entered the world at Eve.

It's this incredible parallel where God says, okay, hold on. Let me redeem the story the same way it was broken. Let me show you that I can make all things new. In the midst of the unknown, in the midst of the fear, he's been faithful since Eve and he was faithful to Mary. In your unknown, in your challenges, if there's one thing you can learn from Mary, he is faithful. You can trust that he who spoke a word to you will see it fulfilled.

Right after Mary I want to talk about Anna. Anna has like three verses in the Bible but I love Anna. Some fun facts about Anna. In Luke chapter 2, it says:

Anna the prophetess was also there, a daughter of Penuel from the tribe of Asher. She was by now a very old woman. She had been married seven years and a widow for 84. She never left the temple area, worshiping day and night with her fastings and prayers. At the very time Simeon was praying, she showed up, broke into an anthem of praise to God, and talked about the child to all who were waiting expectantly for the freeing of Jerusalem.

Luke 2:36-38

Anna got married and seven years into her marriage, and mind you, she got married likely around 14. Seven years later, she's widowed. I am 23. That would mean I would have been a widow for two years. That's wild. She spends the next 84 years of her life on her own.

For a woman in this time period, that was not only a lonely experience, it was a dangerous experience. It meant poverty. It meant not having a home. It meant not having safety. It meant not having community. Widows were often viewed as pariahs in society. If you were not under the care of your father or one of your brothers or your husband, you were alone. You were unprovided for.

Here's Anna. In the midst of this, where obviously that sounds like the loneliest thing in the world. Anna found her life seeking God. Anna found herself pursuing God and saying, I'm alone, but I'm not going to be alone. She pursued this God. Something that I think is so beautiful in that is she recognized infant Jesus. Nobody recognized Jesus. People were with Jesus for years and they didn't know who he was. This woman catches a glimpse of Jesus and she knows this is who we've been waiting for. This is the Messiah. This is the Savior.

There's something to be said about this woman who could have mourned and grieved and spent her life in anguish and alone. Instead she sought God so profoundly and sought him with such dedication that she chose not to be defeated by her circumstance. She was sensitive enough to the Spirit that when she saw the Lord, she knew that's my God, that's salvation, that's the freedom of my people. She knew it.

Then fast forward, Jesus does his thing and then he dies and he resurrects and then there's the women at the tomb. Jesus had a lot of disciples, right? We talk a lot about the twelve disciples, but those were not the only people that were his disciples. He also had this group of women that followed him and this group of women that financially supported his ministry. Jesus dies, and the people at the cross are the women, and the people at the tomb are the women.

There's something really special about that. They stayed, right? We have a tendency to run. But these women model something beautiful. They stayed through the grief, staying through the pain, staying when no one else did. They stayed. And because they stayed, they saw Jesus.

One of those women was Mary Magdalene, one of my favorite people in scripture. There's an entire hermeneutical, meaning how we interpret scripture, an entire line of thought that describes Mary Magdalene as the apostle to the apostles. She is the first to see the risen Lord and the first to respond by testifying that she had seen the Lord. The very first post-resurrection sermon is five words. It's, I have seen the Lord. It is the simplest sentence, and it is the most profound message. It is the message that changes lives, and she's the first to preach it. She's the first one to share the gospel of Jesus.

When we really look at Mary Magdalene, this is a woman that was possessed by seven demons. That's a lot. If there's someone that was unqualified, I think it was Mary Magdalene. But this faithfulness of I've encountered Jesus, and because I've encountered Jesus, I have something to do about it. It doesn't matter what business was it of Mary's to walk into a room full of men who were the disciples, who had the power and the authority, and be like, you're wrong, Jesus rose. I saw him. But she did, because when you encounter Jesus, you do something about it.

Mary's the first one to show us how to respond to the gospel. It's to spread the gospel. Abbie's a pastor and we get to preach the gospel. Guess what? The first pastor was a woman.

So I just want to name something here that we're sharing. Could it be intentional who God includes in the narratives of their stories? Think of these women that we've talked about. Eve, the one that's a trailblazer, the one that has gone where no one has gone before, right? The fear that comes with that. We're talking about Leah, someone that was abused, someone that was used. We're talking about women that were burying, that were in times of waiting.

Could it be that God includes all of those things, things like a narrative and a story with Moses' adoption, because he wants you to know that you are not alone, that you are not the first to walk through these, and that not only is Jesus with you, but he has included people and their stories in scripture for us to relate to and to learn from and be encouraged by.

So I just want to name that really quick before we keep going. You're probably like, well, Abbie, what about that one scripture where it says women be silent in the church? I'm so glad you asked. We're going to talk about it today. Yes, there is a scripture where we're talking about New Testament women. A lot of our theology from that comes from Paul and his writings. But sometimes we only take it from one verse or a couple verses of Paul's writings. I'm going to kind of read and I'm going to kind of walk us through how do we wrestle with that.

We see that clearly, yes, like women are speaking and leading throughout the Bible. God includes them. But what do we do? I'm going to read the scripture for you in 1 Corinthians 11. I'm going to read a couple different things.

For man did not come from woman, but woman from man. Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man. It is for this reason that a woman ought to have authority over her own head because of the angels. Nevertheless, in the Lord, women is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman. For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman. But everything comes from God.

1 Corinthians 11:8-12

And then it says:

Women should remain silent in the churches. They are not allowed to speak, but must be in submission as the law says. If they want to inquire about something, they should ask their own husbands at home, for it is disgraceful for a woman to speak in church.

1 Corinthians 14:34-35

But then at the end Paul says:

Therefore my brothers and sisters, be eager to prophesy and do not forbid speaking in tongues. But everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way.

1 Corinthians 14:39-40

A few things that I want to talk about here. Paul was coming from this Roman culture under the Roman Empire, the Roman rule. Paul was a very educated man. He knew how to write, he knew how to speak, he knew the Roman laws. When writers at that time in culture were writing about different things and sharing their opinions, what they would do first is they would quote the familiar law that people knew. They would address the faulty narrative of it. And then at the end of it, they would pose their narrative of it.

So by reading just one of those verses, you could think, well, clearly Paul is not affirming women in leadership. But I want us to go back again to that first Corinthians 11. He's saying, he's quoting a familiar thing that people would have known. He's saying for man not to come from woman, but woman from man. But then at the end of it, he's saying, nevertheless, in the Lord, woman is not independent of man, nor man independent of woman. For as woman came from man, so also man is born of woman.

If you read that, you might think, why is he contradicting himself? Well, he is doing what was a common practice at that time in writing. He's quoting what was familiar, that law, he's quoting that faulty narrative, and then he's bringing in the Lord's perspective. This way of walking through it, if you're interested in learning more, Alison Beth Barr, she's an incredible historian, and she's the one that kind of walks through this, one of the best ways I've seen.

It's the same thing with women being silent in the church. He's addressing, and it's pretty close at that time to a Roman law that he's addressing and saying, this is what you know. So he's like, okay, we're on the same page. This is what you've heard. But then at the end, he's saying, therefore, brothers and sisters, prophesy. Once again, he's using this common practice of quoting what they knew and were familiar with, what was that faulty narrative, and adjusting it. Now, when you are following Jesus, we are no longer living just under the current law and culture, but a new family in Jesus.

What also is important for us to see is other places in Scripture where Paul does affirm women. And it gives us that whole picture. In Romans 16, Paul actually lists like seven different women in this passage that he is affirming in leadership roles. Let me read the first couple verses:

I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a deacon of the church in Cenchreae. I ask you to receive her in the Lord in a way worthy of his people and to give her any help she may need from you. For she has been a great help to many people, including me. Greet Priscilla and Aquila, my co-workers in Christ Jesus.

Romans 16:1-3

We see there that he is affirming Phoebe as a deacon, and he goes on in Romans 16 listing seven other women that he affirms in leadership roles. Now when we're seeing, okay, Paul has more than just these few verses to say about women, there's a whole picture.

Also going back to the passage of women being silent in the church, a lot of that was addressing an educational issue as well. Women because of culture were not educated in the same way that men were. So there's a whole lot more that could literally be a whole two hour lecture. But that's kind of the gist, right? When we look at Paul's teaching as a whole, what does he say about women, not just those few verses and what were some of the background things going on of him quoting the laws and also some of the educational things that he's addressing rather than spiritual.

Then another thing we see from Paul is in Acts chapter 18. He has two kind of moments where he addresses Aquila and Priscilla. The first time he does it, he addresses Aquila and he said, this is Aquila, he is a Jew, and his wife, Priscilla. Name order is super important in biblical writings. The person whose name came first was typically the one that held the power, the authority at that time. The first time, it was pretty normative. The man would have been that position of power. He's saying Aquila and Priscilla.

But then what's interesting is in Acts 18:18, it says that Paul stayed in Corinth for some time. Then he left his brothers and sisters and sailed for Syria, accompanied by Priscilla and Aquila. It goes on to talk about their ministry. But what's happening there, and you can go back in Acts 18 and read the whole passage, but just to sum it up, the first time they're mentioned, it's the husband and the wife. But then when it's for ministry purposes, Paul, he's brilliant, he knows what he's doing here. He puts the woman's name first. So that tells us that he is affirming women to lead and to preach and to teach.

Created as partners

What does this all say to us about biblical womanhood and about our spiritual mamas and what we have to learn from them? The first thing is this. God created both men and women in his image to be co-heirs and partners with him in seeing kingdom come. That is what we were created to do, to be co-heirs, to be partners in seeing kingdom come.

One of the first places that we see this is in Genesis. It says:

God created mankind in his own image. In the image of God, he created them. Male and female, he created them. God blessed them and said to them, be fruitful and increase in number. Fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over it.

Genesis 1:27-28

I want you to notice that God did not create man and say, I give you authority to rule and reign. Then create woman. God created man and woman and then gave authority as co-heirs, as partners to rule and reign. This is so powerful for us to understand. For far too long, half of the church has not been able to be all that God created them to be.

For us to understand this and to lean into this and to say, how can we empower both men and women to live fully as God created them to be, is a game changer when it comes to the kingdom of God.

Don't live in a box

The next thing that we learn from all of this is that no two men or women are alike. There's so many different stories. Maybe you have been in a spot, like I have been in my life, where you feel like you're put in a box, where you feel like you can only do these certain things because you're a man or because you're a woman.

I remember the first time I was 17, I preached my first sermon. Someone that I really looked up to and respected, they came up to me and they're like, Abbie, that was incredible. You are going to make such a great pastor's wife someday. Not what I wanted to hear in that moment. But it was this idea where it was like, okay, I guess I'll be a pastor's wife. But then what happens when I'm graduating from Bible college and I'm still nobody's wife, but I got this call on my life and I'm like, what do I do? Well, I started New Culture Church, so there you go.

It's this idea of sometimes that we are put so much in a box of thinking I have to be this type of woman, I have to be this type of man. To look and say, what if we just leaned in to say, I have to be who God created me to be. That is a helpmate, which is, yes, someone that helps and serves, but someone that's powerful, someone that was created in the image of God.

Jesus broke the curse

The other thing that I want you to see here is that Jesus broke the curse. He removed the barrier so that we can be all that God created us to be. We've hinted at it a little bit, but I'm going to explain it really clear in case you did not understand.

The first thing we see in Genesis is that we were created to be co-heirs, to be co-rulers, to fill the earth, to subdue it, to rule and to reign over it, men and women together as equal partners. Then sin enters the world. There's this curse that has been put on women. What do we see? The first thing that Jesus does is he breaks that curse and he empowers women. Just to make sure we understand, to say once again, there is no barriers for you. You can be all that God created you to be. He broke that curse.

So that means when we're looking at scripture, we have to filter things through that lens. We have to filter things through the lens of what was God's original intent in the garden, and what did Jesus show us after he resurrected, was raised back to life, and broke the curse and all of those barriers. Everything in between those moments, we have to filter through the lens of the garden and post-resurrection. That's where we start to see, because post-resurrection, he says to the women, do not be afraid. Go and tell your brothers to go to Galilee. There they will see me. The great commission. He doesn't just say, hey men, or hey women. He just says, go make disciples. We all have that call on our lives to go and to make disciples, to be who God created us to be, equal partners, co-heirs that get to help bring kingdom come.

Remember right in the beginning where he said, it is not good for us to be alone. We need each other to partner fully if we're going to see God's kingdom come.

Our response: be who you're called to be

So what's our response to that, right? It's like, oh, wow, that's a lot of stories, a lot of great stuff. But what do we do because of that? I think it's really simple, and it's the best thing ever, and it's the most freeing response ever. We get to live as exactly who God called us to be, plain and simple.

Men, you get to be exactly who God called you to be. Women, you get to be exactly who God called you to be. Together we get to support each other. We get to partner together. We get to make space for each other. We had to make sure that each other's voices are heard. We get to be co-heirs and there is nothing stopping us. Our response is to say yes to being who God has called us to be. Not diminishing, not minimizing, not counting ourselves out or counting each other out.

You get to be the stay-at-home mom or the stay-at-home dad because that's what God has asked of you. You get to be the CEO. You get to get the big degree. You get to start the business. You get to be the teacher, the nurse, or whatever it is that God has asked of you because it's what he called you to do.

I say this all the time and sometimes I think it kind of surprises people when I say it. I'm not interested in being like a girl boss. I'm really not interested at all. I'm not interested in you being the man. I don't need you to do that. I think it's a little gross both ways if I'm totally honest. I'm really interested in being a hundred percent who God asked me to be. I'm really interested in you finding peace and confidence and rest in being exactly who God called you to be. Not a standard that was set for you. Not who you think you're supposed to be or what you're supposed to do. Not, this is what women do and this is what men do. I just want you to be who God asked you to be.

Closing prayer

I'm just going to ask you to close your eyes. I just want to pray for the people that maybe there are stories that we mentioned that you do relate to. I just want to encourage you today that God did include it, even for this moment, so that you can be reminded that you're not alone in your pain, in your suffering, and what you're walking through.

So I just want to take a minute. If you're here today, and there was just a story that you related to, just so I can see who I'm praying for, would you just, with every eye closed, just raise up your hand. I just want to pray a prayer of encouragement. If there was a story of a woman that you're like, I relate to it, male or female here today, you can just raise your hand and we're just gonna pray.

God, right now we thank you so much that even in this moment, that your Holy Spirit is moving and that you are working in ways we cannot see to restore and to redeem that which was taken, that which was lost. God, that you see us, that you know us, and that you have included people in your story like us. That you want to continue to use us, redeem us, restore us to be powerful witnesses for you.

So God, I pray right now for every hand that was raised, saying yes, there's a story here that I relate to. Whether it's someone that's waiting for something and praying on my knees, or someone that has been hurt, someone that has been taken advantage of. God, I pray for healing to come. God, I pray that they would continue to lean into their God-given identity. That you created them in your image, Lord, and that you want to use them for your glory to be co-heirs with you, Jesus.

We thank you for that, God. And I just pray for everybody else here today, Lord. Would you help us to not dismiss this word, but to lean into it. To lean into this idea that you have created us all in your image to be your witness to all of the earth. That we get to share in bringing kingdom come right here in our city, in our place.

I pray for the women here right now. God, would you help us to own our identities? Would we not feel the pressure to fit into any sort of box or any sort of labels, but we would continue to say, Holy Spirit, who have you created me to be? And would we live that out?

God, for all the men in the room, would you help them to continue to empower and to create space to encourage us to be all that you created us to be? And to also learn from these stories of saying, God, what are you speaking to me? What is my role to play in this?

God, we're saying these prayers and praying for generations to come that sons and daughters will prophesy of your goodness, of your kingdom, of your glory. So we thank you, Jesus, for this word today. We love you, and we thank you for all the mamas in the room and the sacrifice that they have made, and we pray that they'd feel honored today in just how special you created them to be. We ask all this in your name. Amen.